The Law Desk - Parental Alienation Is An Abuse Of A Child's Rights

Thetraumatic effects of parental alienation and the damaging scars which thispsychological abuse leaves on the children, were laid bare in the Pretoria HighCourt in July 2023, where a mother removed her 3 minor children from SintMaarten in the Caribbean where they were living back to South Africa withoutinforming her husband or getting his consent.

Parentalalienation is regarded as an abuse of a child's rights when "a child allieshimself strongly with one parent and rejects a relationship with the otherparent, without legitimate reason." It is normally seen in child-custodydisputes and is the result of indoctrinations by the alienating parent. The sadresult being it that causes a child to suffer serious emotional trauma and robsa child of a meaningful relationship with a parent which could last a lifetime.

Inthis case the couple, a psychiatrist and dentist had been living abroad for anumber of years. The marriage relationship turned sour with both accusing theother of abuse. In September 2022, the husband began divorce proceedings inSint Maarten.

Thefollowing month whilst her husband was away, the wife returned to South Africawith the children, where she set up her home and enrolled the children in aPretoria school. In March 2023 she applied to court to be awarded primaryresidency of the minor children.

Thehusband brought a counter application demanding that the children be returnedto Sint Maarten. The court found that the Hague Convention did not apply andsaid that it could not order the immediate return of the children to theirhabitual residence in Sint Maarten.

Thecourt heard evidence from a number of expert witnesses that the children weresubject to a sustained campaign of parental alienation inflicted by the mother.Curator ad litem was appointed to act on behalf of the children, as well as apsychologist and a wellness therapist.

Thecurator, a former senior family advocate, reported that he found the behaviourof the children towards their father as "shocking". He said the children didnot want to return to Sint Maarten as they were scared of their father andbelieved that he wanted to put them in a dungeon. All the experts reported thatthe children's fear towards their dad was irrational and unjustified.

Thechildren feared that their father would kill them. They would make statements which appeared to be rehearsedsaying extremely negative about their dad that he never played with them, helived like a pig and that he swore at them.

Onechild said he wanted the father out of their lives. He said his mother had toldhim that nobody could force them to see his father. In contrast to the constantnegativity towards their dad all three children did not say anything negativeabout their mom.

Thecourt found that the mother was trying to plant the message that the childrenwere in need of protection when they were with father. Given the presentsituation, the court said it even though it was unpalatable, it was grantingthe mother interim primary residency of the children.

Itimposed strict conditions on the mother, gave the father greater contact rightsto the children and ordered both parents to pay for counselling and therapy forthe children to deal with the effects of parental alienation.

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